Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
