doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
