just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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