Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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