Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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