Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
