I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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