just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
