We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
