about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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