he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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