the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
