I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
