You're so nebulous sometimes
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
