one word: firstdatebathroomanal
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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