I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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