Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize