she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
