I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
