i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
