If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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