I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Porn is love you can see.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Randomize
