Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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