I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
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