Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
