Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
You pole danced in your parka.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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