he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
