The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Is Oprah even human
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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