I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
