No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
vagina is talking i cant
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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