i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
