Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
