im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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