the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
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