Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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