I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
