great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Randomize
