Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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