Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
