I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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