Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize