Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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