He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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