Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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