was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
