I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
