she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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