How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize