Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Are we still banned from the library?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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