just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
