For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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