I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
