But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
